Wednesday, May 9, 2007


Just as the lunar cycle has been discovered to affect the tides and the menstrual cycle (see the connection?), it has been found erroneously that the orbit of Mars around the Sun is inversly proportional to the time taken for the differentiation of spermatids into fully fledged sperm cells. Similarly, homicidal mania is just the alphabet in the mirror. Don't believe me? Go have a look.
Yes I know I'm wrong. The bright blue LED of speaker power signalling made me test you for worthiness. You are now worthy of inheriting the Bostik Glustik. But you can't have it. It's mine.
I saw a gecko crawling around on the ceiling of the train from Uni. A sparrow rolled by and picked up a piece of bread. The gecko on the other hand, was a foot away from the nearest fire escape. It let the fire escape. So did I. Then I trapped it in a butcher's freezer. The rent was a months passage to the ant's Olympic size pool. Little did he know that the buggers were filling it with formic acid. Luckily I knew. Cheat me of 5 pounds of kitty litter will you? Well permanent marker to you too!!
F/A = E ∆L/L
The stress on my spinal cord (diameter 3cm) due to my brain (mass 25++ kg) is equal to the bounciness of a quilt covered rubber duck multiplied by (the change in length of a blade of grass as a helicopter flies overhead divided by the actual length of a leg hair). From this equation calculate the time wasted by you to measure the level of my mental instability.
Or you could not. And neither would I.

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